December 27

Haley, Dustin, Mary, Morgan, and I were off to Fernie by 8:30 am on Friday.  We took our time...stopped several times for food and bathroom breaks...went through fairly heavy snow from Taber to Fernie...and arrived after 11.5 hours on the road.  Dustin had a mishap when her arrived.  His snowmobiles were on the deck of his truck.  One snowmobile became wedged under the overhang of the motel entrance.  Dustin handled the situation with remarkable calmness.  I admire that.

Haley and Dustin were impressed because the hotel staff had presents waiting in their room for the dogs. Yes, my grand dogs were part of our Christmas vacation.

After settling in to our rooms, we had pizza before bedtime.  Not recommended for a guy like me who has trouble sleeping when I eat late. 

On Saturday, Morgan, Dustin, and I spent the day skiing.  Morgan kept us entertained with his Shell Lake-style skiing.  He was the only skier on the hill wearing a Carheart High Viz ski jacket.  The highlight was going to the top of the mountain in white out conditions, getting buried in snow, wandering of the run into an avalanche area, losing a ski, swimming up a 45 degree slope to retrieve my ski, thinking I was going to die, and eventually descending the hill by sliding on my bum until I reached an area that was skiable.  Don't let me be misunderstood...we had a great time and certainly have a story to tell.  I don't know how people can ski multiple days.  My leg muscles were tighter than a drum after nearly 5 hours of skiing.  Could have something to do with the fact I am 60.  Needless to say, we didn't ski on Christmas Day.  We were done.

After skiing, we hit the hot tub, then went to a wonderful East Indian Restaurant for an amazing meal...lots of curry and nan bread.  The girls scoped out a Lutheran Church for Christmas Eve service.  All five of us enjoyed the service.  There was no pastor.  A lay person led the service.  Very informal, but meaningful.  Mary and I participated in a reading during the service.  Morgan managed to burn his hair on a Vesper candle.  Don't ask me how.

On Christmas morning, my beautiful girls had prepared Christmas stockings for all of us.  I cried.  It was a tough, tough day.  I felt like a zombie.  Full blown grief.  I was just going through the motions.  In the afternoon, we went back to the ski area for a sleigh ride.  Nice touch. 

As we left the ski hill, I asked the girls if they could come to my room for a talk.  Talking things through is how I heal.  The girls were wonderful.  I usually feel like I have to be strong and support them.  On Christmas Day, it was the girls who were strong for me.  I felt much better after a long talk with them.  After our chat, we hit the hot tub again, then went out for Christmas dinner.  We capped the night off with our family's favorite card game..."Oh Crap".

Haley and Dustin stayed an extra day to go snowmobiling in the mountains.  Morgan, Mary, and I drove back to Saskatoon on Boxing Day.  I listened to Snoop Dog and Metallica for 9 hours.  Do you know it is possible to go into a trance that allows you to block out all stimuli? 

Today was a day of getting back to an empty house.  These are tough times, my friends.

December 19

I had another eventful weekend.  On Friday night, I attended a Christmas party for people who had lost loved ones.  On Saturday night, my neighbors had me over for a refreshments.  This winter, we haven't been borrowing one another's power by running extension cords through the fence.  We found that after all the power sharing we did last winter that our power bills didn't improve much; therefore, we plug our appliances into our own outlets.  All joking aside, I am truly blessed with loving, supportive, considerate neighbors.  I am well cared for by family, friends, and neighbors.
On Sunday morning, the Opheim Clan got together for Christmas brunch at the Willows Golf and Country Club.  David flew in from Toronto on Saturday.  Audrey, her children and their partners joined my gang for a great meal and visit.
Last night's Fireside Singers Concert at Teacher's Credit Union Place was amazing, as usual. I played hockey this morning and I am presently on a one game scoring streak.  Tomorrow, I am looking forward to dinner with some of my old teaching colleagues.
On Friday, my gang is taking me to Fernie for a weekend of skiing.  I likely won't be posting for a while so I will wish anyone who still reads this blog a Blessed Christmas.  Enjoy your families.  Spend time meditating on how many blessings you enjoy.  Give thanks, rejoice, forgive...take time to go out and look up at the sky.  Think about the first Christmas night.  Husbands, love your wives.  Wives, love your husbands.  Thing about how lucky you are to have one another.  If you lost a partner, give thanks for the many good Christmas memories you have stored in your heart.  God Bless us everyone.

Principal’s Message

Every year I am charged with the responsibility of writing the family Christmas letter.  I usually go through the whole year without ever stopping to reflect on the type of year I have experienced.  As a rule, I am an optimistic person who expects the best, hopes for the best, and thankfully experiences the best that life offers.  I have lived a charmed life, but this past year’s events have challenged my optimism.  There have been some good times, but serious illness in my family has meant days and days of hospital visits, doctor’s appointments, sitting in emergency, and the daily worries that hang over your head like a dark cloud.  Furthermore, our house has been torn apart as a kitchen renovation project that was scheduled to finish on Groundhog Day will hopefully be finished by Christmas Day.

When you are in the midst of trying times, it seems that things will never change.  There doesn’t seem to be a way out.  There is no hope.  Although I am not an old man, I am old enough to know things do change.  In fact, there are gifts that are present even in the midst of trials.  I am overwhelmed by the incredible goodness of people and the boundless opportunities that come out of hard times.

The author, Samuel Johnson, stated, “Hope is necessary to every condition.  The miseries of poverty, sickness and captivity would, without this comfort, be insupportable.”  If hope is so necessary, I do feel that schools need to be a place where hope lives.  I have a hard time believing there is a child who is hopeless or a child who has no hope.  Children need to know that whatever condition exists for them, there is hope.  Moreover, children need to know that experiencing hope can best be accomplished by offering hope to others.

December 16

Yikes, I haven't posted for 12 days.  My excuse is: I have been sick with a cold.  Yup, I get a good old fashioned cold 2 or 3 times a year without fail.

Other than fighting a cold, I have been busy playing hockey (although I actually called in a spare to play for me yesterday because I was too sick).  If anyone is interested, there is an article in the Saskatoon Express describing Saskatoon 60 Plus league. 

David arrives tomorrow from Toronto.  We are having an Opheim Family get together brunch on Sunday at the Willows Country Club.  On Sunday night, I will attending Mary's Fireside Singers concert at TCU Place.  On Friday, December 23, we leave for Fernie for a weekend of skiiing and will return on Boxing Day.

Last night, Haley, Audrey, and I attended a service of remembrance at Redeemer Lutheran.  We lit a candle for Judy and had a meaningful time of remembering.

Principal's Message:  (I am not sure whether I shared this one before)

Your actions are affected by your feelings.  Your feelings are affected by the way you think.  What you think is affected by situations that happen to you.  Let us go backward.  Situation – Thought – Feeling - Action.  Situations cannot always be controlled.  Sometimes things happen to you that you could not control.  They just happen.  The one thing you can control is what you think.  Thinking is a decision you make.  You can choose a negative feeling leading to a negative action or you can choose a positive feeling leading to a negative action.  I have another name for negative thinking.  I call it “stinking thinking”.

There was a time when I used to believe people were wrong to feel upset, jealous, envious, angry, and depressed, but I came to realize that feelings are neither right nor wrong.  It is how you feel.  What I spend a lot of time doing as an educator is finding out what thought patterns lead students to feel the way they do.  For instance, when a child is being bullied, he/she may think, “I did something that invited abuse so I am getting what I deserve, no one loves me and no one cares for me, everyone is talking behind my back, I am junk, there is no help, and there is no way out.”  When a child thinks that way, they will become depressed, there will be more abuse, and the bullying will usually escalate.  In this case, we need stamp out the “stinking thinking” and let children know they deserve respect, they are loved, you cannot control what others do, but you can control what you think, there is help, and there is a way out.  When you start to think positively, positive results are more likely to follow.

Indeed, there are other positive thoughts that we should plant in children’s minds such as:

If I want to succeed in school, athletics, arts, technologies, or anything else in life, then I will have to work hard, learn from failure, overcome adversity, ask for help when necessary, and accept responsibility for my actions.

It is a privilege to attend school.  Knowledge is power.

Following the path of least resistance could lead you off a cliff.

If I want to have friends, then I must be a friend.  I must think of others and do to them what I would have them do unto me.

      I am not always right.  There are times when I need to say, “You were right.  I was wrong.  I am sorry.”

      Twenty years from now, no one will remember the score in this soccer game, but we will remember every poor sport we went to school with.

Yes, children need your help to stamp out “stinking thinking”.  We need to help them adjust their thinking just as we need to adjust our own thinking to come up with the positive thought that will lead to positive action.  In this life, they will have tribulation, but the thoughts they choose will determine whether they live victoriously or live a defeated life.  Remember, pain is inevitable.  Misery is optional.

December 4

And so the weekend ends...  On Friday night, I attended the ballroom dance class Christmas party.  My role at every Christmas and end of the season party is to teach the class a line dance.  On Friday, I taught the class how to dance the Cha Cha Slide.
On Saturday, Haley and Mary came over to decorate the tree.  We had a great afternoon visiting and reminiscing.  The girls lead very busy lives with work, gym workouts, and other pursuits that I don't get many opportunities for deep conversation.

I should mention that Haley turned 33 on December 1.  I took Mary, Haley, and Audrey to Los Palapos for Mexican food.  Again, we had a leisurely meal and a good visit with meaningful conversation.

Mary got her wedding photos today.  They are amazing.

On the slate for tomorrow: hockey in the morning and installing Mary's central vac in the afternoon.

Principal's Message

A popular bumper sticker issued by Lion’s Club international read Give Your Kids Hugs, Not Drugs.  In the wacky age in which we live, adults who work with children are somewhat conflicted about hugging children.  There are good reasons for being wary; however, I would like to suggest that the bumper sticker message reminds me that there is an appropriate time for hugging kids and the benefits are many.

            Not many years ago, I was toying with the possibility of applying for a job that would take me out of the school setting.  The main thing that caused me to forego the opportunity was the “huggy” students who would come and give me a hug at the end of the school day as I was doing bus supervision.  I couldn’t do without the hugs and I know that kids need lots of hugs too.

            Psychology 101 didn’t teach me much, but I do remember one study done by Harlow, a researcher who created surrogate mother monkeys made of chicken wire and soft carpet.  The surrogate monkeys dispatched all the food and sustenance needed by the young monkeys.  Harlow found that young monkeys preferred the surrogate mothers that were soft and cuddly over surrogates that were made of chicken wire only; however, monkeys raised by surrogates displayed anti social behavior. Young monkeys needed to be raised by real monkeys that cuddled, cradled, and hugged their young.  In the same way, our children need more than the food, clothing, Gameboys, and Teddy Bears that we provide for them.  They need hugs.

            Sometimes a hug can say a lot more than words.  On one of the saddest days of my life, someone gave me a hug and the hug spoke volumes.  The hug took away some of the hurt and let me know that the person cared.  Hugs succeed where words fail.

            Yes, I guess it sounds weird for a principal to be talking about hugs when I could be talking about setting high standards for achievement, the importance of the 3 R’s, and the wonderful possibilities presented by modern technology.  The aforementioned things are important, but more importantly, children need to know they are loved.  If you are not sure how to tell them they are loved, start out by giving them a hug.  It is never too late to start and there will never be a time when you should stop.